Il Mago ("the magician" in Italian) will have to pull out all his tricks this season as the unquestioned man-of-the-hour in Toronto. (bargnani.com)

Depth chart:
PG: Jose Calderon, Jarrett Jack, Marcus Banks
SG: DeMar DeRozan, Leandro Barbosa
SF: Linas Kleiza, Sonny Weems, Julian Wright
PF: Amir Johnson, Ed Davis, Reggie Evans, Joey Dorsey
C: Andrea Bargnani, David Andersen, Solomon Alabi

Relevant fantasy players and projected draft positions/per-game stats:
Andrea Bargnani – F/C (Rd. 3-4): 20 Pts, 1.5 threes, 7 Reb, 1.5 Blk
Jose Calderon – PG (Rd. 9-11): 11 Pts, 1 three,  6 Ast
Jarrett Jack – G (Rd. 9-11): 13 Pts, 1 three, 5 Ast
Leandro Barbosa – G (Rd. 10-12): 14 Pts, 1.5 threes, 1 Stl
Linas Kleiza – G/F (Rd. 10-12): 12 Pts, 1.5 threes, 4.5 Reb
DeMar DeRozan – G/F (Rd. 10-12): 10 Pts, 1 Stl
Amir Johnson – PF (Rd. 12+): 14 Pts, 5 Reb, 1 Blk
Ed Davis – PF (Rd. 13+): 5 Pts, 5 Reb, 1 Blk

Sleepers:
Kleiza, Johnson

Most likely to surprise:
DeRozan

Most likely to disappoint:
Bargnani

Category specialists:

• Threes: Barbosa, Kleiza
• Assists: Calderon

Things to watch:

• if Bargnani settles into a starting C or PF role (and how that affects Johnson)
• how the timeshare at PG between Jack and Calderon plays out
• how the battle for the starting SG job between DeRozan and Barbosa turns out

Team’s statistical NBA ranks from 2009-10:

• Pts: 5th
• FGM: 5th
• FGA: 19th
• FG%: 5th
• FT%: 13th
• 3PTM: 15th
• Reb: T23rd
• Ast: 10th
• TO: T6th
• Stl: 30th
• Blk: T20th

Fantasy-friendliness for 2010-11: C-

New uniforms, new look: D-Will has a new lineup to lead this season. (NBA.com)

Depth chart:
PG: Deron Williams, Ronnie Price, Sundiata Gaines
SG: Raja Bell, Othyus Jeffers
SF: Andrei Kirilenko, Gordon Hayward, C.J. Miles
PF: Paul Millsap, Jeremy Evans
C: Al Jefferson, Mehmet Okur

Relevant fantasy players and projected draft positions/per-game stats:
Deron Williams – PG (Rd. 1): 19 Pts, 1.5 threes, 3.5 Reb, 10 Ast, 1 Stl
Al Jefferson – F/C (Rd. 2-3): 19 Pts, 10 Reb, 1.5 Blk
Paul Millsap – PF (Rd. 6-7): 14 Pts, 7.5 Reb, 1 Stl, 1.5 Blk
Mehmet Okur – F/C (Rd. 9-10): 10 Pts, 1 three, 5 Reb, 1 Blk
Andrei Kirilenko – F (Rd. 9-10): 12 Pts, 5 Reb, 3 Ast, 1.5 Stl, 1.5 Blk
Raja Bell – SG (Rd. 12+): 10 Pts, 2 threes
C.J. Miles – G/F (Rd. 13+): 9 Pts, 1.5 threes
Gordon Hayward – G/F (Rd. 13+): 8 Pts, 1.5 threes

Sleeper:
Kirilenko

Most likely to surprise:
Bell

Most likely to disappoint:
Millsap

Category specialists:

• Threes: Bell
• Steals: Kirilenko
• Blocks: Kirilenko, Millsap

Things to watch:

• how Williams meshes with Jefferson
• how Okur adjusts to (probably) being a sixth man
• Kirilenko‘s health
• Kyrylo Fesenko‘s contract status

Team’s statistical NBA ranks from 2009-10:

• Pts: 4th
• FGM: 3rd
• FGA: 23rd
• FG%: 2nd
• FT%: 23rd
• 3PTM: 23rd
• Reb: 12th
• Ast: 1st
• TO: T26th
• Stl: 4th
• Blk: T15th

Fantasy-friendliness for 2010-11: A-

KD vs. Natalie P: Who ya got? (Marc Lecureuil/Getty Images for Nike, OLYCOM/bauergriffinonline.com)

Hurricane Earl be damned — it’s Friday and we’re on the cusp of Labor Day weekend, which means it’s time to bust out the big guns for this week’s edition of Fantasy Friday.

The ladies continued their winning streak last week as Jennifer Aniston edged out Danny Granger. This adds to the heap of victories for the gals, which includes Jessica Alba beating Dwyane Wade, Jessica Biel defeating Dwight Howard and Kristen Stewart vanquishing Dirk Nowitzki.

The men will have to do their best to notch their first win, so who better to take on that task than the projected king of fantasy basketball this season? It’s with great pride and hope — along with a fluttering heart — that I present to you this week’s matchup: Kevin Durant vs. Natalie Portman.

Both are among the best in their professions, and they do things the right way. Let’s continue an analysis of their similarities by discussing Ms. Portman’s career, with parallels to Durant [in brackets].

Natalie [KD] didn’t take long to bust out her undeniable star power with her role as Mathilda in “The Professional” [Texas]. Since then, she’s matured and developed into one of the most talented, alluring and respected actresses working in Hollywood today. Sure, she’s had to endure some low points, starring in such fine films as “Anywhere but Here,” “Where the Heart Is” and the “Star Wars” prequels [Seattle], but make no mistake — those movies weren’t bad because of her. Ms. Portman managed to do the best she could with those laughable scripts and came out undiminished. Let’s not forget that she’s also starred in some solid movies, like “Garden State,” “Closer” and “V for Vendetta” [OKC]. Ms. Portman is clearly one of the most talented and beautiful ladies gracing the silver screen [fantasy rosters] today, and has also proven to be one of the most versatile [ditto]. After all, who else can claim to have starred in a viral rap video and an artsy, foreign-language film (“Paris je t’aime”) in the same year? Despite her immense talent, she hasn’t drawn the attention that many of her peers have, mainly because she doesn’t make daily headlines with scandalous photos, certain types of tapes or trashy late-night behavior [bad decisions in Colorado, a weakness for guns or an hour-long televised decision]. One could easily (and justifiably) point out that despite winning accolades like a Golden Globe Award and a Saturn Award [Rookie of the Year Award, scoring title], she hasn’t won the big one yet: an Academy Award [an NBA championship]. Nevertheless, Ms. Portman is still young and it’s more than conceivable that she’ll win her share of laurels [MVP awards, rings, No. 1 overall fantasy statuses] in the many years to come. For now, we’re all just licking our chops for her next performance in “Black Swan” [2010-11 season].

What say ye? Who gets your blood pumping more: Kevin Durant at No. 1 in your fantasy drafts, or Natalie Portman in…anything (hearts included)?

The good news is McGee and Blatche are two of the most promising fantasy players this season. The bad news is they're on the Wizards. (Keith Allison/Flickr)

It’s time to pump out concise rundowns of each NBA team from a fantasy basketball perspective. Give Me The Rock and Fantasy Basketball Daily are among the sites already getting started, and keep an eye out for others — the more resources you read, the better. We’ll be going in reverse-alphabetical order. These will all assume nine categories in 12-team leagues.

***

Depth chart:
PG: John Wall, Kirk Hinrich
SG: Gilbert Arenas, Nick Young
SF: Al Thornton, Josh Howard
PF: Andray Blatche, Yi Jianlian, Trevor Booker, Kevin Seraphin
C:  JaVale McGee, Hilton Armstrong

Relevant fantasy players and projected draft positions/per-game stats:
John Wall - PG (Rd. 5-6): 17 Pts, 4 Reb, 6.5 Ast, 2 Stl
Gilbert Arenas - SG (Rd. 6-7): 19 Pts, 2 threes, 3 Reb, 4 Ast, 1.5 Stl
Andray Blatche - F/C (Rd. 6-7): 16 Pts, 8 Reb, 2.5 Ast, 1 Stl, 1 Blk
JaVale McGee - C (Rd. 9-11): 8 Pts, 8 Reb, 3 Blk
Yi Jianlian - PF (Rd. 10+): 10 Pts, 6 Reb, 1 Blk
Kirk Hinrich - G (Rd. 13+): 9 Pts, 1 three, 1 Stl
Josh Howard - G/F (Rd. 13+): 10 Pts, 3 Reb, 1 three, 1 Stl
Al Thornton - F (Rd. 13+): 11 Pts, 4 Reb

Sleeper:
Jianlian

Most likely to surprise:
Arenas

Most likely to disappoint:
McGee

Category specialists:

• Threes: Arenas
• Steals: Wall
• Blocks: McGee

Things to watch:

• how Wall affects Arenas‘s value
• how Arenas affects Arenas‘s value
• Howard‘s ability to work himself back into game shape
• how Blatche will respond to taking a step back from being the man
• Hinrich‘s role in the backcourt
• Young‘s hot hand

Team’s statistical NBA ranks from 2009-10:

• Pts: 26th
• FGM: 23rd
• FGA: 16th
• FG%: 24th
• FT%: 14th
• 3PTM: 24th
• Reb: T14th
• Ast: 27th
• TO: T21st
• Stl: 28th
• Blk: 11th

Fantasy-friendliness for 2010-11: C

Acid test, indeed. I just wish more real people were around to test the acid with me. Wait, that's not -- oh, nevermind. (dok1/Flickr)

I’ve been a big fan of Yahoo’s Fantasy Basketball platform for nearly my entire fantasy basketball life, so when they unveiled the auction draft format this year, I was quite intrigued. I’ve always wondered about auction drafts and imagined that they’d be lots of fun, but I just never got around to them.

But since Yahoo introduced it and after reading Patrick’s case for auction drafts at Give Me The Rock, I just had to try one. So tonight, I entered a mock auction draft — $200 to spend, 12 owners (six real, six automated), head-to-head format and 13 roster spots (PG, SG, G, SF, PF, F, C, C, Util, Util, BN, BN, BN). It started out well but around 20 minutes into it, the other five real owners set themselves on autobid and I was left all alone, which explains why I still had $15 after I filled out my roster, was able to nab Paul Pierce, O.J. Mayo, Andrew Bogut and Blake Griffin at such insanely low prices, and kind of lost focus with my last batch of picks. So yes, the results below must have one o’ these bad boys appended to it:

*

My knee-jerk takeaways:

1. Auction drafts take a lot more patience and discipline than good ol’ snake drafts. Why? Mostly because you can’t finish a pick in two seconds flat. This consequently causes you to feel antsy if you haven’t bought a player in the past few minutes, which might lead to hasty bidding and regrettable purchases.
2. Computers will overbid on mediocrity early on, which is why an owner in this mock draft suggested that us real owners should nominate scrubs in the beginning so the computers would spend their money foolishly. This simple proposition proved to be true, and I wonder if the same fishing strategy can be used on newbies — like me.
3. It appears wise to nominate players that you have little or no interest in actually buying.
4. There seems to be three basic strategies: 1) burn most of your cash on the big boys early on, then rely on your fantasy smarts to land you very cheap players (ideally with solid value or upside) to fill out the rest of your roster; 2) splurge on one or two studs, then attempt to fill out the rest of your roster with talent similar to what you’d end up with in a snake draft (i.e., from best to worst); 3) wait patiently for other owners to dump their coffers, then try to fill out most, if not all, of your spots with medium-priced talent.
5. Keeping an eye on other owners’ remaining funds seems smart.
6. Owners may pay more for a player they just plain want than for one that actually deserves that amount of money.
7. I like the fact that I have a shot at every single player, no matter how small that shot actually is.
8. I like how one overzealous owner’s bid can be compounded with another overzealous owner’s n+1 bid — let the dummies pay more for Josh Smith than Pau Gasol.
9. I like and don’t like how a smart pick is a lot more vulnerable — meaning, picking Danilo Gallinari at No. 50 overall isn’t as simple as waiting for others to pass on him before clicking the “Draft” button and stashing him away on your roster unchallenged. Every pick, whether smart or dumb, is open for all to see and dare.
10. I wish an electronic auctioneer’s voice would narrate these drafts, and I wish you had the option of choosing the voice’s language/accent, like you can on GPS devices. I also wish that one of those options were “Antoine Dodson.”

While my first auction draft was surely not an accurate experience of the true nature of this beast, I’m still excited to continue participating in mock versions, as well as my first real one within the next month or so. I really wish auction drafts were somehow quicker, but I can imagine them being more fun with actual chatter with people I know.

Here are the results of the mock auction draft:

My team:

1. Deron Williams (Uta – PG) $47
2. Pau Gasol (LAL – PF,C) $40
3. Mo Williams (Cle – PG) $26
4. Al Horford (Atl – PF,C) $32
5. Paul Pierce (Bos – SG,SF) $2
6. Andrew Bogut (Mil – C) $1
7. O.J. Mayo (Mem – SG) $2
8. Eric Gordon (LAC – SG) $8
9. Chris Kaman (LAC – C) $8
10. Luis Scola (Hou – PF,C) $8
11. Blake Griffin (LAC – PF) $2
12. Andrei Kirilenko (Uta – SF,PF) $8
13. Mike Miller (Mia – SG,SF) $1

All picks in order of nomination (my picks in bold; ‘Real owner #’ = real, ‘Team #’ = automated):

What are your thoughts? Do you have any pointers regarding auction drafts?

Listen to Batman, Robin. (batmancomic.info)

We finally pulled off our mock draft on Thursday evening, and I’m happy to say that it was privileged enough to receive the attendance of many of my favorite fantasy basketball bloggers. Here’s the cast:

- Justin from Life is Just a Fantasy … Basketball Blog (Life is Just a Fantasy … Basketball Blog)
- Patrick from Give Me The Rock (GMTR_Patrick)
- Doneycat from Tale of 9 Cats (Doneycat)
- Tippy from Fantasy Basketball Daily (supposedly “ended up” with the automatically
generated “Fantasy god”)
- Henry from Weakside Help (Weakside Help)
- Eugene, my good friend and fantasy basketball nemesis (ec236)
- West, a reader who seems to have missed the draft; next time!
- Boogerboys, an unknown participant who was on autoselect until round eight
- drafting hungover, another unknown entrant

While I don’t like leagues that are any smaller than 12 teams (too shallow, too much parity between teams, don’t get to utilize the depths of your fantasy knowledge), there wasn’t any other choice at the time slot we drafted in. No matter: the fantastic company made it easy to forget the size of our draft.

Without further ado, here’s a quick and dirty recap of our mock draft (nine categories, head-to-head), with round-by-round analysis. (Henry already posted his analysis at Weakside Help.) Especially admirable picks are in green, while questionable picks are in red. (Picks made on autoselect were exempt from color-coded and written judgment.) I’ve also decided to include the pick times for each pick, in case anyone was interested. (The average pick time was 19.2 seconds, for all you fellow inquiring nerds out there.)

Round 1:

First-round comments: Gasol at No. 4 overall? Yeah, it’s a reach according to just about every set of rankings out there, but he is a C-eligible stud and getting that position filled this early saves you from potential scrambling down the line. Other than that, the rest of this round went almost as scripted, though it was a bit surprising to see Wade fall to me at No. 10.

Round 2:

Second-round comments: While I understand why Granger would fall out of the first round, especially in a 10-team draft, it was still exciting to see him fall to me at No. 11 overall. He has top five potential, but his health does concern me. Still, knowing that I wouldn’t have to live with the fact that he was my first pick helps from a psychological standpoint. Melo at No. 14 still seems a tad bit of a reach to me, but I know I could be in the minority there. Patrick just filled up the two starting C spots required by the league’s settings with two studs — huge. Evans at No. 19 is a huge reach, given that this is a nine-cat league. The only reason to pick him this high is if you think he’ll take a huge step forward in his sophomore campaign, which doesn’t seem likely given his lack of threes, turnovers and pedestrian free-throw shooting.

Round 3:

Third-round comments: I was a bit surprised that J-Smoove fell out of the top 20, but so be it. Westbrook anywhere north of the fifth round is a gamble, given his poor FG%, lack of threes and frequent turnovers. Nevertheless, I understand his appeal and potential. Doneycat appears to have the early leg up on steals and blocks with AI9 joining G-Wall and D-Ho, while Weakside Help appears to have the makings of a strong small-ball team with Curry, Lee and now Bargnani manning his first three spots. Meanwhile, Life is Just a Fantasy … Basketball Blog (LJFBB from here on out) appears to be gunning for across-the-board dominance with LBJ, ‘Reke and Kidd. I was elated to get Horford at No. 30.

Round 4:

Fourth-round comments: Let the record show that I slotted in Booze in my predraft list and mistakenly pressed “autoselect” (new draft interface = some getting used to). While I’m not the biggest Boozer fan this season, I was glad to have him shore up my frontcourt with Horford and Granger. Murphy at No. 33 might have been acceptable before he landed in New Jersey, but I just have a hard time thinking he won’t take a step back with Lopez gobbling up rebounds and a potential timeshare with Derrick Favors on some nights. Bogut could make sense at No. 36 eventually, but with reports that his elbow is still touch-and-go makes that a very risky pick. Rose, like Westbrook, just has too many weaknesses to warrant anything earlier than a sixth-round pick, though I’ll grant that it’s quite possible that his offseason work on his defense and three-point shooting could translate into a fantasy surge this season. Patrick just keeps on bulking up that sexy frontcourt here with Jefferson, who somehow fell to No. 37, making him a huge steal.

Round 5:

Fifth-round comments: It’ll be interesting to see how Noah meshes with Boozer, but I don’t have too big a problem seeing him go in the top 50, especially given that he’s one of the few remaining true centers left on the board — I just think there are other lower-risk big men left for the picking. I really dig the Collison pick for two reasons: 1) I think going in the late 40s is a solid, if not slightly conservative, valuation of his fantasy goodness this season, and 2) it shows some restraint on everyone’s part to have him fall this “late.” I can picture Collison being grabbed in the 30s of many drafts, but taking him around this neck of the woods seems much more prudent. Gallo at No. 50 is an absolute steal, in my estimation. If he stays healthy, I see him finishing with top 30 value this season, with Stoudemire and Felton really opening things up for him.

Round 6:

Sixth-round comments: While I think it’s bullish, I’m down with taking Turk at No. 51. He should thrive in Phoenix and might have a shot at finishing in the top 40 this season. KG at No. 53 is optimistically accurate, despite whatever health concerns he brings. Aldridge at No. 54, however, is a bit high for my tastes, given his inconsistency when Oden was in the lineup for the first 21 games of 2009-10. Martin continues to fly under the radar, and should have an easy time returning the value of his No. 55 pick here, especially with Ariza out of Houston. This is where Patrick had to pull a LeBron and leave us before finishing the task at hand to tend to his one-month-old (congrats again!), but he set a very solid foundation (Gasol, Stoudemire, Billups, Jefferson, Mo Williams) for his squad. Camby at No. 59 is great, especially since that valuation seems to take into account whatever risk Oden’s return poses to his value.

Round 7:

Seventh-round comments: Blatche and Jennings will go around here in most drafts this season, though both pick positions are a bit optimistic for my tastes. Yao at No. 69 would be around the absolute earliest I’d take him, but if he plays even three-quarters of the season, he’ll put up top 50 averages with no problem. Brooks at No. 70 seems straight-up silly to me, since he’ll have a real shot at notching top 40 status this season — but maybe I’m biased.

Round 8:

Eighth-round comments: This was a near-perfect place to take Randolph. Henry takes on two consecutive giant question marks in Yao and Griffin, but they should pay off for the most part. Bravo for him for taking the “Biggest Testicular Fortitude” award for this mock draft. Morrow at No. 73 is perfect. Arenas at No. 74 is great fun — I think he’s the most fun gamble this season and I’m in the camp that thinks he’ll surprise rather than disappoint. I dig Gordon at No. 75, and in a perfect, injury-free world I’d feel the same for Bynum at No. 76, but this is indeed a world that is far from perfect and riddles with injuries. I’d recommend waiting for Bynum to drop to the late 80s and into the 90s in most drafts. Thornton at No. 79? Grand larceny.

Round 9:

Ninth-round comments: I’d still take Kaman over Hibbert 10 out of 10 times, but I understand the reasons why others would disagree. I absolutely despise TP (a nickname that I think is the most apt for him in fantasy terms) anywhere before the 10th round. Lopez at No. 89 frustrated me since I was licking my chops at the prospect of him falling to me just one pick later. (Good one, Henry.) I’m OK with Hickson at No. 90, though I foresee a healthy portion of inconsistency from him.

Round 10:

Tenth-round comments: I hated my pick here. It took me a full 49 seconds to finally close my eyes and swallow the pill that is Stuckey. Don’t get me wrong — he’s worth No. 91 overall, but there were a bevy of other sexier picks that I wish I had gone with instead, especially since I’m still skinny at the C spot at this point. So when Doneycat took Cousins (whom I like this season) at No. 93, I slapped myself on the forehead. Allen at No. 96 could be a huge steal. Yeah, he’s getting older, but we all know that shooters have good longevity in real life and fantasy land. McGee at No. 98 is understandable, but I just can’t see him taking the enormous step forward that so many are expecting — way too much inconsistency in the cards, methinks. But with his incredible blocking abilities, I can’t say too many bad things about that pick.

Round 11:

Eleventh-round comments: Williams should have no trouble returning top 75 value, so that was a very savvy pick by LJFBB. Gordon does hold a lot of promise, but with an ankle that still isn’t fully healed and T-Mac around to eat into minutes at SG, I’d try to avoid him at all costs. Biedrins, Childress and Thomas are all peachy keen at this stage. I was relieved to grab Dalembert at No. 110 to plug up my second C spot. He’ll surprise owners in Sacramento this season, especially since they’re ready to unleash a faster offense.

Round 12:

Twelfth-round comments: AK-47 has a lot going for him this season, and though I expect him to miss at least 15 games this season, I have no qualms with taking his talents here. Hill was a great pickup here for Weakside Help, as was Varejao for Boogerboys. Not much to roll your eyes at here.

Round 13:

Thirteenth-round comments: Augustin could be a winner here, though I still think Shaun Livingston has a really good shot at winning the starting PG gig in Charlotte. Taking Oden at No. 125 overall seems about right to me, and he could end up giving the best return on investment of the entire draft. Kleiza at No. 128 might be my favorite pick of the draft. He’s one of my favorite sleepers this season and should get plenty of minutes in a weak Raptors SF spot. Ibaka is a rock-solid take at No. 129, as he should continue to roll with blocks and a potential starting gig. Miller at No. 130 boggles my biased mind. He could be a top three three-point maker this season in Miami, so it was no-brainer to take him here. I used up 34 seconds to give me more time for my next pick.

Round 14:

Fourteenth-round comments: Urdih started and finished the season strong last season and he appears set to continue his role as the starting point guard in Sac-Town. I wouldn’t be surprised if he finished the season with top 70 value. Azubuike is a solid pick-and-wait option, and if his knee heals up well he’ll be a good pick here. Chandler is a solid selection here because of Azubuike’s continued rehab, though he stands to lose value as the season wears on. Monroe is intriguing this season, which makes him an ideal last-round pick.

FINAL ROSTERS:

‘Twas an all-around jolly good time. I think I’m very competitive in threes, but took on one or two too many risks and could’ve bulked up my center position a bit better. Still, I’m satisfied with my mock draft and would be excited to see how my squad would stack up with the others here. While I think some of these final rosters are a bit healthier than others, I’ll leave it up to my readers to decide which final roster looks the strongest. Vote in the poll below and let us know your thoughts in the comments section.

Much thanks to Mock Draft Central for offering a spiffy mock-drafting platform to us fantasy basketball junkies. And nothing but the biggest fist bumps to my fantasy basketball buddies for turning up, offering some fun in-draft chatter and helping to make this a great mock draft. I’m looking forward to the next time we do this.

Until next time…

What's wrong with Granger and Aniston? (Matt Dial/The Indianapolis Star; Flame80/Flickr)

Happy Friday, readers.

It’s time for another edition of Fantasy Friday. If you’re new ’round here, click on over to the inaugural matchup to read a quick description.

Alas, the girls have been kicking the boys’ butts, with Jessica Alba besting Dwyane Wade, Jessica Biel beasting Dwight Howard and, most recently, Kristen Stewart outdoing Dirk Nowitzki. Ouch.

Let’s see if the men can get their first win in this battle of damaged goods: Danny Granger vs. Jennifer Aniston.

The parallels between the two are simple: nobody seems to want them despite their obvious gifts.

Ms. Aniston has always been beautiful and even if you dislike her, it’s hard to deny that she’s a stunning gal at age 41. The strange thing is that she seems to have the hardest time finding a good guy to stay with her (unless you’re in the Bill Simmons camp and think her stubborn singlehood is a PR move). How can this be? How can a lady this pretty (just watch how men’s heads turn when they pass by one of those Smart Water ads on the street) and mildly talented be spurned so many times by so many men? There must be something wrong with her (besides her ever-rising age), right?

Granger is in the same boat. We know he’s immensely talented and a fantasy force to be reckoned with. He hits threes like his next meal depends on it, scores in bunches, and is a pretty good thief and blocker. The dude should be a no-brainer as a top-seven fantasy player when you look at his averages. Why, then, is he slipping to the latter parts of the first round, and beyond? Because he’s so maddeningly unhealthy. At the ripe age of 27, he isn’t all that young anymore, and his chances of regaining consistent health are getting slimmer by the day.

Both Ms. Aniston and Granger are worthy of admiration, but it seems that many have a hard time seeing either as a keeper.

So the question is, who would you rather keep: Danny Granger or Jennifer Aniston? Vote in the poll below and let us hear your thoughts in the comments section.

Our mock draft will take place tomorrow, Thursday, Aug. 26, at 8:15 p.m. EDT at Mock Draft Central — draft #4563.

It’s a 10-team draft, so hurry on over and reserve one the remaining slots.

Again, the draft is going to be based on nine-category, head-to-head settings.

Let me know if you have any questions in the comments section below, via Twitter or via e-mail.

If you can’t make this one, don’t worry — we’ll set up a few more before the season starts.

I'd like to tell you that KG's telling the ref to "Check out these links," but he's probably saying something closer to "**** ******* *** **** *********." (Keith Allison/Flickr)

A friendly reminder: Our flash-mob mock draft at Mock Draft Central is taking place tomorrow evening (Thursday, Aug. 26). Since I’m gunning for us all to take part in a free draft (bloggin’ ain’t easy — or lucrative), I can’t predict exactly what time or how many spots (10 or 12) will be available in the slot we get, but it will be sometime around 7 p.m. EDT (it won’t be earlier than that). The good news is that you can reserve your spot as soon as the time slot is created by the good people at Mock Draft Central, so keep an eye out for an update here and on Twitter sometime late tonight or early tomorrow morning about exactly when the draft will take place. It will be 14 rounds of nine-category goodness, and you choose your pick position. After the draft is over, I’ll post a round-by-round analysis where I’ll publicly laud or embarrass your picks (half-kidding). I hope you’re excited as I am.

• You’ll find Dirk Nowitzki ranked as the No. 4 overall fantasy player just about everywhere, but that doesn’t mean it’s cool. Justin at Life is Just a Fantasy…Basketball Blog talks about why he’s going with Stephen Curry at No. 4.
• Henry at Weakside Help is optimistic about the likes of Greg Oden and Andrew Bynum this season, but Pau Gasol? Pau-lease.
• Fantasy Basketball Daily is in the midst of his position-by-position fantasy rankings (based on a scoring system). Tippy’s going with Deron Williams over Chris Paul.
• The great Dan Gilbert is the guest poster for Give Me The Rock’s Cleveland Cavaliers fantasy team preview, and guess what? Comic Sans, that’s what.
• Yao Ming‘s famous foot (shouldn’t it have a nickname by now?) is declared fully healed and the big man appears optimistic. The AP report mentions his conditioning (he lost 40 pounds in the last 3.5 months, and wants to lose more weight) and that his minutes will be limited in the early going, as expected. If you’re optimistic about his fantasy value this season, giggle with glee.
• Kevin Garnett used to be a fantasy monster — now he’s relegated to being good for a highlight reel’s worth of cussing. Head over to Basketbawful to witness some of KG’s verbal diarrhea, but put earmuffs on the ears of any children that might be in the room.

Stop yawning -- we haven't even started yet. (Keith Allison, katewilliams94/Flickr)

The week is finally over, which means it’s time for another edition of Fantasy Friday.

So far the ladies are kicking some serious arse: Jessica Alba edged out Dwyane Wade in our inaugural matchup, and Jessica Biel completely outmuscled  Dwight Howard last week.

Maybe it’s time to tone things down a bit, and what better way to do that than to stick two lively firecrackers into the ring: Dirk Nowitzki vs. Kristen Stewart.

The parallels between these two go beyond their luscious locks — they delve into the deep recesses of their colorless, unflinching, unsmiling souls.

So what is their common ground? Let’s find out by discussing Ms. Stewart, with parallels to Nowitzki [in brackets].

Kristen [Diggler] has managed to lock herself into the realm of the Hollywood elite [fantasy elite] by tagging along for the ride that is “Twilight.” What people may overlook is that she’s had a productive (albeit, mildly successful overall) career [ditto] since her first film in 1999. The problem is that her demeanor is so steady and, dare I say, boring [his play is so insipidly consistent], that it sometimes overshadows her good looks [good stats]. After all, Ms. Stewart is known to smile only when pink moons cross paths with purple suns while a werevampire weeps under a double rainbow — or, never. Does she have the goods to be placed among the higher ranks of the prized young ladies in Hollywood [upper echelon of fantasy drafts]? Sure. Does her boring disposition [less-than excitable lines] make it easy to confidently say that [take him at No. 4 overall]? Nope. Alas, this is the rub that is Kristen Stewart.

All that to say both Ms. Stewart and Dirk are boring, though they each have their appeal. So the question is, Which is more exciting: taking Dirk at No. 4 overall, or taking Kristen Stewart out on a date? Vote in the poll below and let us hear your thoughts in the comments section.